Most of us have grown up thinking and believing it is too selfish to think of oneself before others.
But what if I told you otherwise?
What if prioritizing yourself is the key to living a fulfilling life? How could I possibly say that when our culture, our society, teaches us to be selfless?
Our decisions are shaped by so many factors—our family, cultural values, and societal expectations.
From an early age, I felt like I was never enough. I carried a deep sense of insufficiency and incompetence, always striving to meet external expectations. Saying “no” felt impossible. Expressing my own needs felt selfish. If someone needed me, their request automatically became more important than my own plans. How could I possibly tell them I had something else to do? How could I be so rude as to prioritize myself?
Looking back, I see it clearly—I was a people-pleaser. I wanted to be liked, loved, accepted. And in doing so, I neglected, rejected, and abandoned myself. I expected others to give me the acceptance I wasn’t willing to give myself.
But why? Why did I place my worth in the hands of others?
Because I believed I wasn’t good enough on my own. And when you don’t feel enough, you start running—running that extra mile to prove yourself, running after validation, running toward an ever-moving finish line of worthiness.
From childhood, we are conditioned to measure our worth by external markers—money, power, attractiveness, status, and relationships. But the truth is, when we tie our self-worth to these fleeting things, we will always feel lacking. The inner critic will never be satisfied.
I am not enough. I don’t have enough. I don’t do enough.
But who decides what “enough” is?
The cycle of insufficiency never ends. Every time we achieve something, there’s another goal waiting. Another standard to meet. Another expectation to fulfill.
The most important decision you will ever make—the one that will shape your relationships, your work, your faith, and your future—is the commitment to love and accept yourself.
Because when you choose yourself, you show the world how you deserve to be treated. You step into your own power. And in doing so, you break free from the illusion that your worth lies anywhere outside of you.
You are enough. Just as you are.