Every Christmas, I host an Angel circle.
It is my way of honouring Christ’s light as a frequency of love, compassion, courage, and truth.
But this year, as I lit the candles and opened sacred space, I felt something profoundly different.
This Christmas was not just about welcoming light.
It was about becoming whole.
Where the Year Truly Began
My year began on my birthday, sitting in a San Pedro ceremony.
There were no dramatic visions, only an unwavering clarity.
One message repeated itself gently yet firmly:
“It is time to balance the masculine and feminine within you. Trust your magic.”
For years, I have lived, healed, and worked almost entirely through my feminine… intuition, feeling, surrender, softness, and holding space.
That is my natural language. That is where my healing path opened.
But that day, another part of me asked to be acknowledged.
The masculine within structure, grounding, safety, direction, protection had been aiting for my attention.
The Mountains and the First Yes..
You can read about it here:
Soon after, I was invited to the mountains, Dharamshala.
For the first time in 15 years, I attended our Angel teacher’s reunion through the Diana Cooper School.
What surprised me most was how easily I said yes.
No overthinking.
No hesitation.
Just a clear inner knowing.
That YES marked a shift from surviving life to participating in it.
Standing in the mountains, I felt a long-forgotten version of myself return. Not a new self… an original one.
Home, Memory, and Closure
This year also took me back to Nagpur, my birthplace and with that shift came emotions I hadn’t prepared for.
My parents suddenly felt closer in a way that was tender, raw, and undeniable.
Returning after 35 years, I expected memories to hurt. Instead, they healed me.
The city released me, and with that release came closure I didn’t know I was still seeking.
Meeting My Father as a Human Being
One of the most profound moments of this year was finally seeing my father not through the eyes of a wounded child, but through the heart of an adult woman.
For the first time, I felt his helplessness.
The limitations life placed upon him.
The weight he carried without choice.
Blame dissolved, and Compassion took its place.
And in that moment, something healed further. I wasn’t just understanding him. I was reclaiming my own masculinity, the part of me that stands steady, protects, decides, and holds life with strength and integrity.
The Dance Returns
And then… my body spoke.
At the wedding, without planning or self-consciousness, I danced as if no one else existed. There was no performance. Only freedom.
Later, on the fourth day of hosting the angels at home, the dance returned again.. Naturally.
This was not just a movement. My feminine finally felt safe enough to express because my masculine was present enough to hold.
That dance was confirmation from Spirit:
You are no longer split.
Your body trusts you.
You are home.
The Inheritance I Finally Saw
One of the hardest realisations this year was seeing how my lack of confidence in my own magic had unknowingly been passed on to my son.
Not through words but through the energy I was
Children don’t listen to what we say.
They absorb who we believe ourselves to be.
That awareness changed everything.
And this is where Mother Ayahuasca and Father San Pedro, in spirit, returned as guides showing me beauty, belonging, and self-trust.
Leaving Death Behind
In the mountains, in movement, in understanding my parents, I saw something clearly:
For a long time, I had not fully chosen life.
I was still existing. Coping. Holding myself together.
This year, that changed.
This year, I said YES—again and again.
Yes to feeling.
Yes to joy.
Yes to life.
Birthing a Long-Held Vision
This year also carried the courage to bring a dream into form.
After years of holding the vision in my heart, I finally launched a couple of products and AyniWasi Energy Medicine School, a school created to hold space for people to learn Energy Medicine in a simple, easy, and deeply experiential way.
AyniWasi was born from everything this year taught me:
- That healing soemtimes happen if we are in allowance
That awareness itself is medicine
That the lived experience matters – Your and Mine
That wisdom must be embodied, not just understood -
This was my masculine meeting my feminine in form.
When my intuition found its structure,
vision found its grounding,
and my heart finally came back home.Launching the school was not just a professional milestone.
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It was a declaration to the Universe
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I trust my magic now.
I trust my experience.
I trust myself enough to lead.Sharing the link here, would love for you to visit and send your love and blessings to this vision of mine. https://ayniwasi.com.
What Christmas Means to Me Now
This Christmas has not been about sacrifice but resurrection.
About laying death down… old identities, shrinking my light, fear of visibility and choosing life with my whole being.
I welcome light not only into my heart…
but into my being, my body, my voice, my movement.
This year has been huge. Quite foundational.
And as I close this year.
I am grateful
for integration.
for understanding.
for finally choosing life fully and completely.
Merry Christmas.
I am sending you so much love and praying
May you feel safe enough to embrace your light in totality.